Desire

Yesterday (Wednesday, since in my head and I haven't gone to sleep and it is therefor still Thursday even though it is not almost 30 minutes into Friday), I was ready to quit my job.  Everything was just too much.  I have not had many days like that (I can think of three other teaching days, and two days post-Stella), but yesterday was a doosy.  I didn't want to teach anymore.  Yep, turn in a letter and not go back until after school was out.

I didn't, though.  I did call an emotional safety night (amidst tears of sadness, fear, and a little bit of guilt) and told Pret that we were going out to dinner.  We went to Subway.  And it was wonderful.  I got to spend time with Pret and Lilly, and even thought about Stella. I came home and read my book and watched some movie with Stella.  I took time for myself.

This morning (Thursday), I got down on my knees and prayed.  I prayed for a desire to want to go to school/work.  I know I didn't want to.  So I knew I needed to just have a desire to want to.  You know, like Alma 32:27, where you just have to desire to believe, not even believe, to have your faith blossom.

Thankfully, that desire was given and I was able to get up and go.  And it was a good day.  I think it would have been better if it was not the last day of school before a 3-day weekend for my students.  All the teachers I talked to said their classes were crazy.

I know that I had a little angel helping me out today.  I knew I needed her help.  I wore the "other" necklace--the one with the "S" on it, just to help me out.

Do you need help?  Do you need to just have a "desire?"  Seek after that, for, like me, it might be all you can do!

(P.S.  In 24 hours, I'll be in Florida!  Eep!)